Ahonui

Conley is back from surgery and all went as planned. Bleeding appears to have stopped and today marks Day 1 of our new path to recovery. There is some fluid that accumulated in his lungs during surgery, likely due to not having dialysis today. So, he will stay intubated until after dialysis tomorrow.

On a side note, Conley aquired the name "Warrior Pumpkin" along the way, thanks to Nana. It has followed him around these past few months. And now, I've fallen captive to another nickname, Ahonui, thanks to my friend Lucinda.

Below is a small (modified) description about what this means:

This name is Hawaiian, and commonly translated as "patience." However, that translation into English can be misleading, because, as embodied in the word "Ahonui", it doesn't carry quite the same meaning. Generally, when we talk about patience in English, we mean the ability to suffer hardship, or discomfort, or pain, without complaint. There is a sense of inner strength or courage about it, but it's essentially a passive concept. Something bad is happening to you, but you put up with it bravely for as long as it takes. As admirable as that concept might be, it doesn't carry the full meaning of "Ahonui."

The most important element when talking about Ahonui is "aho," and it also means "breath, to breathe," and "to put forth great effort." Though one must put forth great effort to accomplish his aim, that still isn't enough. The word "nui" means "big, much, many; something extending over time, or something very important." "Ahonui" is the word we use to give us a deeper understanding of love. It means "patience." And, it is also the word for "perseverance." This is not the patience of waiting in a line. It is the persistence of knocking on a door until you get an answer. It is not the patience of waiting out a storm. It is the perseverance of moving through a storm to your destination. It is not waiting to get healed. It is using everything you know and doing everything you can to make the healing happen. "Ahonui" can also be translated as "many breaths," the act of moving toward something you want for as many breaths as it takes.

Perseverance does not work on a part-time basis. Fortunately, there are many examples in this world of people who have persevered in the face of seemingly insurmountable odds, and who have accomplished more than was thought humanly possible. Imagine the patience, the persistence, the suffering, the perseverance, the AHONUI that Conley has shown to all of us. What will give you the strength to persevere in the direction of your dreams and desires, plans and goals, wishes and healings, is the love you have for something that you decide is so important, so valuable, so good, that nothing at all can replace it in your mind and in your heart. If your love is strong enough, you will have the ahonui to keep going in spite of doubt, disappointment, fear, misunderstanding, and all the people who tell you that what you want is impossible. In this infinite universe, the only impossibility is whatever you never attempt, and the only failure is when you decide to give up. Everyone knows how much Conley loves life, as shown by his happiness and smiles despite his medical complexity. His love for life is what's drives him to keep fighting; to keep shining his ahonui. And that is what makes him so special to us all.